I’ve been afraid to hope. I feel like my adult life has been full of so many overwhelming challenges, unexpected turns, and blows to my hopes that it has put me in a place where I am afraid to extend that fragile vine of light. It’s not that I’ve been hope-less. There is a difference between being afraid to hope and having no hope. Being hopeless looks like in-the-pit despair; feeling like there is no path forward; being at the end of yourself with no energy, gumption or will to move on. Being afraid to hope feels more like disappointment;
Read moreI sprained my ankle in Memphis, which meant my life in Tennessee began with a large black boot on my left foot. As I hobbled around our house, trying to unpack, I lifted a box of bubble wrapped dinner plates from a box, and was suddenly struck by a searing pain in my lower back that felt like I was being stabbed by a knife. The horrible, guttural scream that erupted from my body brought my family running to my side, one grabbing the stack of plates from my hands, the others trying to move me to the couch. I
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In early July, I moved across the country with three kids, two cats and two fish. It took us four days to travel the 2100 miles from central California to Tennessee, and I have a grey hair to prove each and every single mile. In all honesty, the actual move was not as trying as preparing to move. We downsized our lives from 4000 square feet of living space to all that could be contained in a 28-foot moving trailer. The last six months of my life were spent hosting yard sales, selling off small appliances, childrens clothes and the
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